Archive for October, 2010

Christmas comes early

Posted: October 30, 2010 in General

My blackberry chat with Snake, concurrently playing in the MGM poker room in Vegas says it all for last night’s session:

“@Empire. Guy here with a massive wad of 50’s in pocket. Buying £250 @ time. Raising blind from any position by just shoving in a fist-full of reds, usually £45ish. He’s only looking at his cards once he gets a caller, and is calling 90% of his hands and then shoving randomly on most flops. I have position and am isolating like a madman, but no joy so far. This is frustrating but fun!!”

Snake: “Yum yum then.”

“20 minutes in, and this guy is on his 8th buy-in!!!!!!!!!!! …

Make that 9th buy in. Just called £200 on the end with 33 on a 8AKK8 river………. I’m topping up to £400.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! GIVE ME A HAND!!!

Got him!!!!!

Doubled through – £700 pot with top pair no kicker.

Unreal. 11th buyin, two back-to-back. £250 a time still…

He’s in again…and done. 12 buy ins and out. He left three grand in the hole. Last hand shoved with two undercards on the turn.

Hilarious, there was even a crowd of dealers standing-by to watch the carnage at the end. Table broke as soon as he left – it’s 6.45am and the remaining players are like giggly children on Christmas morning! Fun fun fun”

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Walking Back to Houston

Posted: October 21, 2010 in General

Lodged a rather tidy £850 loss last night in the Canine private game, not bad for 1/2 NL.

My main undoing was a strict inability to hit even one pair with a series of overcards, and having an assorted array of junk hold-up against my nut no-pair holdings. A few of the bigger hands of note:

  • With a nice TAG image, I 3-bet Ioannis’ open from late-position with KTs and take two callers to a flop of 34J with two diamonds. Racist and Ioannis check, and with just a little more than a pot sized bet left I shove for £160 more. Racist somehow finds a hero call with K3o and I lose the £400 pot, despite us running it twice.
  • I open UTG to £12 with AKs, Alastair calls. I c-bet an undercard flop, Alastair calls. I check a king on the turn for pot-control and to allow Alastair to bluff the river. He does bet indeed, but has rivered the gutshot I gave him a free look at and wins a £300 pot.
  • The straddles go 1/2/5/10/20/40/80 and I’m first to act on the button, WTF?! Squeeze out Ace … ten. Some thought given to passing to reduce variance, but this is such a +EV spot that I can’t bring myself to do anything other than shove for my stack of £250. It looks hopeful after a few folds, but Jody somehow finds a call with Q7s to chase the £20 he’s invested already and I’m toasted in an £850 pot  — to be fair, Ioannis also called in the £80 seat and his 55 left me in third place on a queen high board.
  • My last rebuy of the night has whittled down to £115 after I incorrectly pass JJ on an ace-high board to a Jody river-shove. Ioannis opens to £15 and I shove AKs. Two callers to build a pot of £350, Ioannis’ T6s holds up and I’m walking back to Houston…

Internet w**ker

Posted: October 17, 2010 in General

I enjoyed a rather hilarious retarded moment around 3am at the Empire last night, managing to mightily piss off a somewhat annoying woman who’d been winding me up with her nit prattle for a while.

I’d just come down from a rather ridiculous bout of hysterics, following a discussion with Snake about anti-tells and coming up with a plan to play-act tourette’s at the table – in between swearing and spitting, yelping out your actual hand (“TWO PAIR! COCK!”) in a series of small pots, showing to establish credibility as a genuine sufferer, and then putting an almighty slap on any big stacks with a fake (“W*NKER! I’M BLUFFING”) after a huge overbet with the nuts. Apart from Snake, the rest of the players had no idea why I was virtually under the table laughing my head-off like an absolute drunken buffoon – nothing but tea and lime-sodas all night, I was just delirious from almost five hours solid of unplayable hands.

Anyway, I decide to play one blind Baron style from the BB (yes, I know he normally does this from the button). UTG raises to £10, and with the woman in the SB and my call three of us take a flop. Both streets are checked all around, and on the river there’s a four straight out there, I think 32475 rainbow. Woman checks her SB, and I decide to look with a plan of betting-out anything. Somewhat bemused on peeking to note that I have 86s for the nuts. There’s only £25 in the pot, so I go for a giant overbet, shoving to £125 (I’m a little short-stacked at this point in the night). The raiser folds fairly quickly, and nit-woman starts complaining about what a ridiculous bet it is. In the hope of talking in a call from 2-pair or an improbable under-straight I decide to go for the “I’m a twat” line of shtick, and loudly tell her to ‘fold faster, love’. She bemoans my lack of grace and I stick a few more slightly out of order comments in. Unfortunately her nittiness is too much for me, and she folds AKo face-up, calling me an idiot for not “getting another £20 out of her with a proper bet”. She’s made a good fold, but her lack of understanding of why the overshove is a so much better line than the value bet is just too much for me, and I collapse in full-on hysterics right in her face. She fumes some more, calls both Snake and myself ‘internet w***ers’ (why he got tarred with my brush I’ve really no idea!) and after a few more hands unfortunately storms off to another table, presumably to tilt off her money to some other lucky punter.

Sometimes it’s fun to be a dickhead.